{3:05 minutes to read} This is a continuation in our article series that focuses on joint and sole custody. Click here to read Part 1 or Part 2.

Shared custody that involves young children – children below the age of four – must be handled with care. It is delicate to balance the need to foster attachment, security, and stability with their primary attachment figure against the need to foster a healthy relationship with both parties – a process which involves multiple and repeat visitations.

According to research done by Pruett in 2012, caution is required when considering whether young children should regularly spend time alternating between two homes, especially in the presence of parental conflict. In such cases, it is suggested that follow-ups with those children should be built into the specific parenting access arrangements.

McIntosh and Smyth (2012) suggest that during the first years of life, repeated and prolonged absence from the primary attachment figure can be built over time, but is a uniquely stressful experience for young children. In response to that increased risk, McIntosh and Smyth suggest that parents should be encouraged to wait until child attachment and cognitive language development takes place, allowing the child to be ready to master the task of repeated separation from their primary caregivers.

The Child’s View of a Shared Parenting Arrangement  

A child’s view of a shared custodial arrangement is highly contingent upon the nature of the custody arrangements. Haugen (2010) performed an extensive study in Norway in 2010 that involved fifty children in shared care custody arrangements. The study found that, for some children, shared custody arrangements are a pleasure because it allows them to maintain a relationship with both parents. Meanwhile, for others, the experience is a burden because it involves constant back and forth without having a single place to call home.

Some universal factors seem to account for the differences in children’s perspectives and the relative success of the custodial arrangement, including:

• Whether the children’s needs are prioritized or whether the arrangement is based solely on the needs of the parents.

• Whether the arrangements are flexible or rigid – specifically, legal arrangements that are not responsive to the children’s needs are more likely to lead to dissatisfaction.

• Whether the children feel equally at home with both parties.

• Whether or not children feel they have a voice.

The available evidence suggests that children are happiest when they feel that they are being heard and their opinions are valued rather than having custody arrangements imposed on them.   

Ultimately there are numerous factors that can account for the success of a shared custody arrangement, but by understanding and prioritizing the needs of young children, the stress on the child can be minimized for their benefit.

I look forward to your thoughts or questions. Please contact me at nycforensics@gmail.com with questions or comments.

Dr. Alberto Yohananoff
NYC Forensics
dryohananoff@nycforensics.com
P: (646) 284-5600
F: (212) 706-9136

Posted in Conflict Resolution